The Great Pretending

by Mortal Void

/
1.
I never claimed what I do would make sense at all but it works for this present moment all these confused thoughts pretend to guide this empty shell if it doesn't work forwards why not trying backwards? you're in the land of the dead you are in my head you are searching for answers but you only find my rotten mind I don't care if this is self compassion I just know I'm back again at the bottom blind, dead and empty - prevent me I pretend to be as long as you pretend to give, I pretend to live blind, dead and empty - prevent me from searching for the answers blind, dead and empty - prevent me from falling apart prevent me I pretend to be you pretend to give I pretend to live where have all the answers gone? where do all these questions come from?
2.
Thanks 04:25
my skin is corroding my senses are fading away this shell I call body will barely make it through the day it's alright and it's okay I'm not suffering, I just decay you don't need to care you really don't need to care you see me shattered you see me on the ground you see me wasted and it seems that you don't care thanks to all those who let me drown thanks for leaving me always on my own thanks to all those who were called friends thanks for leaving me alone in the end I don't know what to do I don't know how to prove I'm still alive and I will survive this misery thanks to all those who let me drown thanks for leaving me always on my own thanks to all those who were called friends thanks for leaving me alone in the end it's hard to find no helping hand, although you always claimed to be a friend but you don't even realize that my world's breaking like ice my faith in you is gone but that's okay, it's not your fault you don't need to care you really don't need to care you see me shattered you see me on the ground you see me wasted why don't you fucking care? thanks to all those who let me drown thanks for leaving me always on my own thanks to all those who were called friends thanks for leaving me alone in the end I feel like breaking out but you all keep me bound I put all my intentions in this song all my feelings in this sound thanks to all those who let me drown thanks for leaving me always on my own thanks to all those who were called friends thanks for leaving me alone in the end
3.
so afraid, afraid, afraid, afraid joking mistaking and finally... ...just breaking of course I know this is no real solution and it's never meant to be but it just works great for now so go away, get out of my way I'll go on pretending I'm alright and okay please don't ask and don't try to understand why I choke my hope, kill it with my own hands I live the great pretending I wish it was never ending I know there's no need to hate, but I'm so afraid and I don't know how else to get rid off it hating is so much easier than keeping control but as I hate and hate, I'm getting tired, I'm getting old I pretend to love while I'm hating I pretend to live while I'm waiting I pretend to love while I'm hating I pretend to live while I'm waiting to die nothing hurts more than lies now you may say I'm a hypocrite but I can assure you, this all does fit maybe you got me wrong I know what I do but not where I belong
4.
meine Existenz zerfällt bald werde ich verenden die letzten Scherben meines Traums halte ich in meinen Händen tomorrow is already gone yesterday is too far away to remember today is just fading away seems like we'd have a graceful future there's no need for tomorrow the only thing that's left is sorrow and while we're watching today die we're helping to kill the future was heute ist und gestern war es kommt mir vor als war ich nie da gefangen in einem schlechten Traum die Zukunft schon zerstört, zerfetzt tomorrow is already gone yesterday is too far away to remember today is just fading away seems like we'd have a graceful future there's no need for tomorrow the only thing that's left is sorrow and while we're watching today die we're helping to kill the future
5.
empty shell lack of emotions thoughts colliding body collapsing all hope rotting existence dying I'm so sick of lying to myself so sick of pretending I am happy and I pretend to be immortal to survive the boring day why do all the people we love have to die? (at least in our minds) why's there never the chance for a last goodbye? (even if we don't want it) why does it all inflict wounds and create pain? (even if we don't feel it anymore) why's there still nothing, nothing we can gain? (even if we don't care anymore) I'm stuck between my ghosts creating memories, creating my thoughts they're always trying to tell me what I want and what I need but what I get is something else it is so different not just the average of both a segment from another reality a reality I never wanted to see I hoped life would have more to offer I'm so sick of lying to myself so sick of pretending I am happy and I pretend to be immortal to survive the boring day why do all the people we love have to die? (at least in our minds) why's there never the chance for a last goodbye? (even if we don't want it) why does it all inflict wounds and create this pain? (even if we don't feel it anymore) why's there still nothing, nothing we can gain? (even if we don't care anymore) this can't be true this can't be reality
6.
Never Care 05:39
you don't mind just how I feel you think just all in your mind is real never care about what you do to me never care about what if I flee from the pain you inflict from your violent thoughts from your constant reproaches from being humiliated but you never care about me but you never care what I might feel but you never care what I see the only thing you ever see is you but don't forget to think about cause and effect because you might wonder about how I react don't you see? - you're destroying me you're forcing me to the ground don't you see? - you're killing me but you only see what's happening to you I'm sorry but you shouldn't forget that it wasn't me and it's not my fault so please don't blame me for everything you went through I'm sorry but you shouldn't forget you also inflict pain on me and you're not the only one that feels so please don't blame me for not being able to fix you I'm not able to fix you - please don't blame me
7.
Inflict 05:38
you don’t seem to see the damage you have done there’s no empathy at all because no one knows I’m falling and it seems to me that you just don’t care but if you’d want to see we could go anywhere or at least give it a try I cannot sleep for hours, I cannot sleep for days I keep asking myself why and I just wish you would care it would be so wonderful if I wouldn’t have lost you I lost something that I never had there is no way to avoid the loss I have to pay what it costs to have these feelings for someone like you it may take a year or maybe two till I’m all clear from emotions, clear from you and I’ll pretend I got through this I’ll overcome every thoughts and emotions I won’t come back this time, I won’t come back, I promise but you won’t miss me anyway you won’t even realize that I’m gone it would be so wonderful if I wouldn’t have lost you I lost something that I never had there is no way to avoid the loss I have to pay what it costs to have these feelings for someone like you this hole in my heart is supposed to be replaced by you or at least fill the hole in my head by telling me why you don’t care anymore why don't you care?
8.
like the scab from a sore, I scrape off the memories of you this wound will necrotize this wound will cause decay this pain won't go away this pain won't go away you're nothing but a wound that never heals and to my mind you're nothing but pollution just another step away from salvation you're nothing but a wasted emotion it seems the wound is healing again, I scrape the scab too early I won't let this wound heal there won't be anything left to feel this wound will necrotize this wound will cause decay it's not bleeding to the outside but this wound will make me die this wound will necrotize this wound will cause decay this pain won't go away this pain won't go away you're nothing but a wound that never heals and to my mind you're nothing but pollution just another step away from salvation you're nothing but a wasted emotion
9.
I turn around for a last time and I wave goodbye my past it's not that I'd welcome the future but I guess I have no choice I turn around for a last time and I see a hundred blurred faces they seem to smile, they pretend but maybe they're making fun of me I don't know and I don't care at this point I just walk my way I wander down this endless path I don't know where it is leading I hope it's just leading away from here I hope at the end I will lose all fear I passed the point of no return I won't turn around this time I'll just pretend I am happy I am happy and everything is fine I turn around for a last time and I see a hundred blurred faces they seem to smile, they pretend but maybe they're making fun of me I don't know and I don't care at this point I just walk my way everything is fine everything is fine everything is fine everything is fine I still pretend...
10.
Decline 04:45
I'm alone. again? still. more than ever before and no one bothers to ask a second... or at least a first time... is this what I've achieved? did I construct this wall? most of you can't even see me behind is there anything left but the wall? oh yeah...but it seems that no one cares and the one who dares will fuck it all up anyway and the next one who dares will be attacked, will have to pay this is my way up I end up falling down this is my way through I end up on my own is this life? I don't want this I end up falling down I'm falling and I can't wait to hit the ground I'm giving advices, so many advices and even if I'm mostly right this all doesn't work for myself every day just makes it worse and worse it's like I'm falling faster and faster, I can't really say when I'll hit the ground but one thing is for sure: I will break my neck and every other single bone
11.
fuck you and your kind words you know everything you say hurts so please shut up and keep your thoughts in mind 'cause anything you say could just go make me blind you and your dead friends - a rotten assembly grab me with your cold hands I'm trying to defend me don't you ever: try to fill your fucked up mind to make yourself feel better to pretend you got behind you think you know it all you think you know who I really am you think you are so close but you're not even scratching the surface there is no excuse for your misconduct and your lack of imagination there is no excuse for your failure and your sorry existence there is no excuse for your shallowness there is no excuse for your lack of imagination I know you don't care so please do not pretend just because you're afraid I'd make it all an end please shut up don't try to say a word it will be in vain anyway 'cause you can't hold me back this time you and your dead friends - a rotten assembly grab me with your cold hands I'm trying to defend me don't you ever: try to fill your fucked up mind to make yourself feel better to pretend you got behind you think you know it all you think you left them all behind you think you are so close but you're not even scratching the surface
12.
The Last Lie 04:39
"and today, we celebrate a funeral" you promised you'd fix it you promised you'd make everything alright all the time I knew that you lie but I couldn't make my hope die there's a special place in my head for all those that are dead to me for those that pushed me too far there's a special treatment for people like you: I let people die in my mind I know this won't make it alright I know this won't cure anything left behind but I will make it a mess next time you promised you'd fix it you promised you'd make everything alright all the time I knew that you lie but I couldn't make my hope die there's a special place in my mind for those that seem to be blind for all those that don't care anymore there's a special treatment for people like you: I let people die in my mind I know this won't make it alright I know this won't cure anything left behind but I will make it a mess next time
13.
14.

about

14 tracks including remixes by TrümmerWelten and OneCyze Project. Electro-Industrial away from current trends.

credits

released August 12, 2011

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Mortal Void Düsseldorf, Germany

It pretty much sounds like this:
"Ba dum ts ba dum tsa ba dum ba
boo ba dum ba da ba dibi dibi doo."

...and that's just the chorus!

contact / help

Contact Mortal Void

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Report this album or account

Mortal Void recommends:

If you like Mortal Void, you may also like: