The Great Pretending

by Mortal Void

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about

14 tracks including remixes by TrümmerWelten and OneCyze Project. Electro-Industrial away from current trends.

credits

released August 12, 2011

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

Mortal Void Düsseldorf, Germany

It pretty much sounds like this:
"Ba dum ts ba dum tsa ba dum ba
boo ba dum ba da ba dibi dibi doo."

...and that's just the chorus!

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Track Name: Blind, Dead & Empty
I never claimed what I do
would make sense at all
but it works
for this present moment

all these confused thoughts
pretend to guide this empty shell
if it doesn't work forwards
why not trying backwards?

you're in the land of the dead
you are in my head
you are searching for answers
but you only find my rotten mind

I don't care if this is self compassion
I just know I'm back again at the bottom

blind, dead and empty - prevent me
I pretend to be
as long as you pretend to give,
I pretend to live
blind, dead and empty - prevent me
from searching for the answers
blind, dead and empty - prevent me
from falling apart

prevent me
I pretend to be
you pretend to give
I pretend to live

where have all the answers gone?
where do all these questions come from?
Track Name: Thanks
my skin is corroding
my senses are fading away
this shell I call body
will barely make it through the day

it's alright and it's okay
I'm not suffering, I just decay
you don't need to care
you really don't need to care

you see me shattered
you see me on the ground
you see me wasted
and it seems that you don't care
thanks to all those who let me drown
thanks for leaving me always on my own
thanks to all those who were called friends
thanks for leaving me alone in the end

I don't know what to do
I don't know how to prove
I'm still alive
and I will survive
this misery
thanks to all those who let me drown
thanks for leaving me always on my own
thanks to all those who were called friends
thanks for leaving me alone in the end

it's hard to find no helping hand,
although you always claimed to be a friend
but you don't even realize
that my world's breaking like ice

my faith in you is gone
but that's okay, it's not your fault
you don't need to care
you really don't need to care

you see me shattered
you see me on the ground
you see me wasted
why don't you fucking care?
thanks to all those who let me drown
thanks for leaving me always on my own
thanks to all those who were called friends
thanks for leaving me alone in the end

I feel like breaking out
but you all keep me bound
I put all my intentions in this song
all my feelings in this sound
thanks to all those who let me drown
thanks for leaving me always on my own
thanks to all those who were called friends
thanks for leaving me alone in the end
Track Name: The Great Pretending
so afraid, afraid, afraid, afraid

joking
mistaking
and finally...
...just breaking

of course I know
this is no real solution
and it's never meant to be
but it just works great for now
so go away, get out of my way
I'll go on pretending I'm alright and okay
please don't ask and don't try to understand
why I choke my hope, kill it with my own hands

I live the great pretending
I wish it was never ending

I know
there's no need to hate, but I'm so afraid
and I don't know how else to get rid off it
hating is so much easier than keeping control
but as I hate and hate, I'm getting tired, I'm getting old

I pretend to love while I'm hating
I pretend to live while I'm waiting
I pretend to love while I'm hating
I pretend to live while I'm waiting
to die

nothing hurts more than lies

now you may say I'm a hypocrite
but I can assure you, this all does fit
maybe you got me wrong
I know what I do but not where I belong
Track Name: Watching Today Die
meine Existenz zerfällt
bald werde ich verenden
die letzten Scherben meines Traums
halte ich in meinen Händen

tomorrow is already gone
yesterday is too far away to remember
today is just fading away
seems like we'd have a graceful future

there's no need for tomorrow
the only thing that's left is sorrow
and while we're watching today die
we're helping to kill the future

was heute ist und gestern war
es kommt mir vor als war ich nie da
gefangen in einem schlechten Traum
die Zukunft schon zerstört, zerfetzt

tomorrow is already gone
yesterday is too far away to remember
today is just fading away
seems like we'd have a graceful future

there's no need for tomorrow
the only thing that's left is sorrow
and while we're watching today die
we're helping to kill the future
Track Name: Constantly Denying
empty shell
lack of emotions
thoughts colliding
body collapsing
all hope rotting
existence dying

I'm so sick of lying to myself
so sick of pretending I am happy
and I pretend to be immortal
to survive the boring day

why do all the people we love have to die?
(at least in our minds)
why's there never the chance for a last goodbye?
(even if we don't want it)
why does it all inflict wounds and create pain?
(even if we don't feel it anymore)
why's there still nothing, nothing we can gain?
(even if we don't care anymore)

I'm stuck between my ghosts
creating memories, creating my thoughts
they're always trying to tell me
what I want and what I need
but what I get is something else

it is so different
not just the average of both
a segment from another reality
a reality I never wanted to see

I hoped life would have more to offer

I'm so sick of lying to myself
so sick of pretending I am happy
and I pretend to be immortal
to survive the boring day

why do all the people we love have to die?
(at least in our minds)
why's there never the chance for a last goodbye?
(even if we don't want it)
why does it all inflict wounds and create this pain?
(even if we don't feel it anymore)
why's there still nothing, nothing we can gain?
(even if we don't care anymore)

this can't be true
this can't be reality
Track Name: Never Care
you don't mind just how I feel
you think just all in your mind is real
never care about what you do to me
never care about what if I flee

from the pain you inflict
from your violent thoughts
from your constant reproaches
from being humiliated

but you never care about me
but you never care what I might feel
but you never care what I see
the only thing you ever see is you

but don't forget to think
about cause and effect
because you might wonder
about how I react

don't you see? - you're destroying me
you're forcing me to the ground
don't you see? - you're killing me
but you only see what's happening to you

I'm sorry
but you shouldn't forget
that it wasn't me
and it's not my fault
so please don't blame me
for everything you went through

I'm sorry
but you shouldn't forget
you also inflict pain on me
and you're not the only one that feels
so please don't blame me
for not being able to fix you

I'm not able to fix you - please don't blame me
Track Name: Inflict
you don’t seem to see
the damage you have done
there’s no empathy at all
because no one knows I’m falling

and it seems to me
that you just don’t care
but if you’d want to see
we could go anywhere

or at least give it a try

I cannot sleep for hours,
I cannot sleep for days
I keep asking myself why
and I just wish you would care

it would be so wonderful
if I wouldn’t have lost you
I lost something that I never had
there is no way to avoid the loss
I have to pay what it costs to have
these feelings for someone like you

it may take a year or maybe two
till I’m all clear from emotions, clear from you
and I’ll pretend I got through this
I’ll overcome every thoughts and emotions

I won’t come back this time,
I won’t come back, I promise
but you won’t miss me anyway
you won’t even realize that I’m gone


it would be so wonderful
if I wouldn’t have lost you
I lost something that I never had
there is no way to avoid the loss
I have to pay what it costs to have
these feelings for someone like you

this hole in my heart
is supposed to be replaced by you
or at least fill the hole in my head
by telling me why you don’t care anymore

why don't you care?
Track Name: Wasted Emotion
like the scab from a sore,
I scrape off the memories of you

this wound will necrotize
this wound will cause decay
this pain won't go away
this pain won't go away

you're nothing but a wound that never heals
and to my mind you're nothing but pollution
just another step away from salvation
you're nothing but a wasted emotion

it seems the wound is healing
again, I scrape the scab too early
I won't let this wound heal
there won't be anything left to feel

this wound will necrotize
this wound will cause decay
it's not bleeding to the outside
but this wound will make me die

this wound will necrotize
this wound will cause decay
this pain won't go away
this pain won't go away

you're nothing but a wound that never heals
and to my mind you're nothing but pollution
just another step away from salvation
you're nothing but a wasted emotion
Track Name: The Path I Wander
I turn around for a last time
and I wave goodbye my past
it's not that I'd welcome the future
but I guess I have no choice

I turn around for a last time
and I see a hundred blurred faces
they seem to smile, they pretend
but maybe they're making fun of me
I don't know
and I don't care
at this point
I just walk my way

I wander down this endless path
I don't know where it is leading
I hope it's just leading away from here
I hope at the end I will lose all fear

I passed the point of no return
I won't turn around this time
I'll just pretend I am happy
I am happy and everything is fine

I turn around for a last time
and I see a hundred blurred faces
they seem to smile, they pretend
but maybe they're making fun of me
I don't know
and I don't care
at this point
I just walk my way

everything is fine
everything is fine
everything is fine
everything is fine
I still pretend...
Track Name: Decline
I'm alone. again? still.
more than ever before and
no one bothers to ask a second...
or at least a first time...

is this what I've achieved?

did I construct this wall?
most of you can't even see me behind
is there anything left but the wall?
oh yeah...but it seems that no one cares

and the one who dares
will fuck it all up anyway
and the next one who dares
will be attacked, will have to pay

this is my way up
I end up falling down
this is my way through
I end up on my own
is this life? I don't want this
I end up falling down

I'm falling and I can't wait to hit the ground

I'm giving advices, so many advices
and even if I'm mostly right
this all doesn't work for myself
every day just makes it worse and worse

it's like I'm falling faster and faster,
I can't really say when I'll hit the ground
but one thing is for sure: I will break my neck
and every other single bone
Track Name: Under The Surface
fuck you and your kind words
you know everything you say hurts
so please shut up and keep your thoughts in mind
'cause anything you say could just go make me blind

you and your dead friends - a rotten assembly
grab me with your cold hands
I'm trying to defend me
don't you ever:
try to fill your fucked up mind
to make yourself feel better
to pretend you got behind
you think you know it all
you think you know who I really am
you think you are so close
but you're not even scratching the surface

there is no excuse for your misconduct
and your lack of imagination
there is no excuse for your failure
and your sorry existence

there is no excuse for your shallowness
there is no excuse for your lack of imagination

I know you don't care
so please do not pretend
just because you're afraid
I'd make it all an end

please shut up
don't try to say a word
it will be in vain anyway
'cause you can't hold me back this time

you and your dead friends - a rotten assembly
grab me with your cold hands
I'm trying to defend me
don't you ever:
try to fill your fucked up mind
to make yourself feel better
to pretend you got behind
you think you know it all
you think you left them all behind
you think you are so close
but you're not even scratching the surface
Track Name: The Last Lie
"and today, we celebrate a funeral"

you promised you'd fix it
you promised you'd make everything alright
all the time I knew that you lie
but I couldn't make my hope die

there's a special place in my head
for all those that are dead to me
for those that pushed me too far
there's a special treatment for people like you:

I let people die in my mind
I know this won't make it alright
I know this won't cure anything left behind
but I will make it a mess next time


you promised you'd fix it
you promised you'd make everything alright
all the time I knew that you lie
but I couldn't make my hope die

there's a special place in my mind
for those that seem to be blind
for all those that don't care anymore
there's a special treatment for people like you:

I let people die in my mind
I know this won't make it alright
I know this won't cure anything left behind
but I will make it a mess next time